Sabbatical Stories: Jeni Gabrenya
From burnout to frozen waterfalls: how a nonprofit CEO’s midlife sabbatical brought her back to herself.
This is the second in a new series called Sabbatical Stories - a collection of candid Q&As with professionals who have experienced a sabbatical first hand. Each story offers a different window into what happens when we finally make space for ourselves and what we learn when we stop moving long enough to listen.
Produced and edited by Emily Drake
This week we’re featuring Jeni Gabrenya.
Jeni is currently the CEO of a domestic violence prevention and services organization in Illinois. Her 25 years of leadership in this field have focused on violence prevention, children’s exposure to violence, and trauma-informed care. Jeni is also a certified forest therapy guide with the Association of Nature and Forest Therapy. In addition, she serves as the board chair for the Nature Foundation of Will County and with the conservation and sustainability committee for her village.
This is Jeni’s sabbatical story.
What was the primary catalyst or ‘aha!’ moment that led you to decide a midlife sabbatical was necessary for you at this specific time in your life?
JG: I was struggling with depression while running a nonprofit and supporting my son with virtual school during COVID. I had several colleagues who encouraged me to take a sabbatical, which I swore was not possible at first. After I started therapy and began to work on my depression I was able to see that a break from work was essential if I wanted to keep going in my field.
Describe a moment during your sabbatical (or soon after returning) when you experienced a profound shift in perspective, learned something unexpected about yourself, or truly felt a sense of liberation. What was happening, and what did you realize?
JG: Toward the end of my sabbatical I decided to do something I had been putting off for years. I always wanted to see the frozen waterfalls at Starved Rock State Park but I could not find anyone who wanted to go with me. I realized that I could actually go by myself! I booked a weekend alone in a cabin at the Park and spent two and half days hiking in the snow to waterfalls. When I first set out, camera in hand, I paused along the river trail and noticed an eagle. We just watched each other for the longest time and it was an amazing moment. That whole day, I felt like myself. I felt free of burdens or expectations. It was paradise and I made it happen. And it would be the start of my journey to becoming a certified forest therapy guide.
What was the biggest challenge you faced during your sabbatical, and how did you navigate it? This could be anything from managing expectations to unexpected emotional hurdles or logistical issues.
JG: My biggest challenge was pulling fully away from work and stress. As that started to happen, I began rediscovering who I was and what I loved. But before I knew it, it was time to go back to work. It wasn’t enough time. When I first planned for a sabbatical people told me I would need at least three months, and after six weeks I realized they were right. It took much longer for my body to recover from stress than I thought.
How has your perspective on work, career, and personal ambition evolved or changed as a direct result of your sabbatical? Are there any specific changes you’ve implemented or plan to implement in your professional or personal life moving forward?
JG: My perspective on how to live as a full person while working has changed drastically. At one point I was so identified with my work that I could not see myself as anything else. I think that was one of the struggles prior to the sabbatical. Going through the process to get to the sabbatical, the sabbatical itself and then processing the experience all helped me to find out who I am, completely separate from what I do. This led me down a trail of connecting back to my love of nature and my creative side. I began to collect experiences that brought me joy, thinking one day they might become something more, but for now, joy was the goal. Ultimately I have decided that the role I left was no longer serving me. I’m currently transitioning out of the organization. I am building my parachute and it is stitched together with all the lessons I have learned since taking my sabbatical.
Beyond the tangible experiences, what’s the most invaluable intangible gift or understanding your sabbatical has given you that you carry with you every day?
JG: This one is easy: find your joy and do as much of that as possible.
Anything we missed? Any other notes or thoughts that might be helpful for others?
JG: I would like others to know that taking a sabbatical is possible, necessary, and actually good for your team. I hope it becomes something that people can do before they get to the point I was. No one should have to be desperate and begging for relief before they are able to truly care for themselves. My sabbatical was the best thing I could have done for myself and it has allowed me to keep doing the best thing for myself over and over again.
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Thank you for this opportunity to share!